Feeling the symptoms

While I am just a few weeks pregnant, I am beginning to feel the symptoms.

I am sleepy most of the time.  I feel so sluggish and I just want to lie down and watch endless TV.  I feel hungry YET I do not know what to eat.  When I do eat I have heartburn right after and feel like throwing up! 

My energy levels are really down.

Maybe because I still pump - I am lessening it though, as per my OB's advice.

They say being pregnant for the second time is more tiring - because there's a toddler involved.

What do you think?

Families

In the recent month, we were hounded by the sudden death of Iggy Arroyo.  There was fight between his legal wife and is common-law wife.  Although  there were no offsprings from the common law relationship, I am very much bothered by the interview given by the daughter of his common law wife from an actor.

I don't know how to plainly put it but it really bothers me, because the gall of this daughter to talk on national TV about the rights and the wrong.

Let me put my cards on the table - when I was still single - the topics of mistresses and second families were of no importance to me.  I knew for a fact that this was a reality.  I even remember vividly a Youngblood article from PDI that I read so many years ago regarding a person who loathed mistresses, becoming one.  It was a sad reality - but one reality that I never thought would happen to anyone close to me.

I recently learned of a friend with a second family.  When I was told of this fact, I couldn't sleep.  I was really bothered.  I had so many questions but I didn't want to ask.  I wanted to know more but I knew that if I knew more - I'd be more bothered.  I was in a crisis.  I couldn't talk to just anyone because this was supposed to be a secret.  I wished that the news wasn't shared to me.  How I wish I didn't know.  But the reality is - now, I already know.

I couldn't justify the situation.  Let me tell you, I really tried to justify it it my head, but I couldn't.  My brain was telling me it was really wrong, but then I tried to justify - giving myself various of reasons to try to correct that wrong impression I had in my head.  But I just couldn't.

The topic is quite sensitive - because I have friends who are part of the second family.  I can't bring myself to ask them because - truthfully, what do they know?  They were born into it.

The situation I was told was this - to put it in terms that I could understand.  Think of the 'love' triangle as Princess Diana - Prince Charles - Camilla Parker-Bowles.  Princess Di is the legal wife and Camilla Parker-Bowles is the first love.  Its not a matter of siding with whom, but who has the right?  Even if you tell me that it was first love and that despite marrying Princess Di, Prince Charles still loved Camilla.  The fact remains that he still chose to marry Princess Diana. 

But then there's the question of LOVE.  Can you really love two people at the same time?  Remember the tagalog song 'Sana dalawa ang puso ko?'  I'm sure a person can but the question is SHOULD that person love two people at the same time? 

Grabe, I'm so freaking confused!  I mean since I have friends who were born of a second family, I don't want to hurt their feelings - pero ang gulo eh!  Gulong gulo ako to be honest.  It has been two freaking weeks since I learned of this fact and up until now - I AM STILL BOTHERED!  Ano ba Didi, hindi yan mabuti sa kalagayan mo ngayon! 

O yes, I forgot one tiny detail.  Amidst all of this bothered talk, I am I think very emotional on the topic because - I am, expecting another little one.

This is one good news I'd like to broadcast, but I think I'll wait until my next OB's appointment to announce.  Hehehe...

So for those who follow this neglected blog - nauna kayo sa balita!  Hahahaha...

Love, Didi

Baby's Skin Asthma

Kailee has skin asthma, I can't explain how bad I felt that day.  It was unexplainable.  I know it's mababaw and is treatable, but even so - I felt so bad!  I think I was depressed that whole afternoon.  Anyway, I made an entry on my other blog - read on!

Kailee's Skin Asthma

Things we talk about..

As we grow older and mature – so do the topics of conversation.  When we were all younger and in High School, the topics consisted of boys, crushes and college.  In college it was of thesis and what we wanted to do with our lives.  When joined the workforce it was of salaries and where we saw ourselves in five to ten years.  Then after a few years the topics were of getting married, managing a household and having kids.

I swear, I never thought of the day that I will have problems managing my household.  I’ve had my share of helper problems - and just recently, yaya problems.  I’ve shared them with you – and from what you’ve read, it has been stressful!  And since I am purely breastfeeding my baby, things are more complicated.  There is no definite feeding schedule (as compared to the baby being formula fed), I feed by demand which means, when the baby is hungry – that’s the time I nurse my baby.  This method is unpredictable – the baby can ask to be fed in as short as hourly to a maximum of four hour intervals.  When your hired help is not used to purely breastfeeding – things can be hard, but with much eagerness to help, the adjustment becomes a lot easier.

Case in point – my new yaya.  Yaya D was supposed to be my friend Kath’s yaya – but Yaya wanted to work immediately, but she was willing to wait since Kath was going to give birth end of May or early June.  When I was having yaya problems, I sent Kath a text message asking permission if I could have the Yaya that was reserved for her by our agency – and she said yes.  I asked my mom to do the interviewing for me (as she can intimidate and knows more what things to look for and ask)  but the only thing she asked the agency was who the last employer of Yaya D was.  Fortunately, the last employer was a supplier of ours!  My mom then immediately called the supplier and asked how Yaya D was with them.  My mom learned that Yaya D stayed with our supplier for nine (9) years – yes, you read that right!  Nine (9) freaking years – taking care of a newborn, and then eventually taking care of the three kinds (2 girls and 1 boy).  Our supplier was all praises for the yaya, he said that the only problem they encountered was that they were living with his parents who meddled with the yaya’s method – but still, can you imagine staying for nine (9) years?  My mom did not bother to interview the yaya because she thought it was useless – my mom believed in trying them out for a few days to see their capabilities.  And so when Yaya D came to the house – she immediately took the baby from me and took care of her.  As I was watching her, I was impressed because for a person who took care of a newborn some nine years ago – she still knew what she was doing.  I asked her – if she still knew how to take care of a newborn since it nine years ago – she said yes, these things she said – a yaya doesn’t forget.  But the proof would be in her work – and work she did, and she was good.  I did not need to teach her what to do – she already knew them all!  I informed her that I was purely breastfeeding my baby – to which she said that with her previous employers they were mixing breastmilk and formula – and that I’ll be her first ever breastfeeding only employer.  I also informed her that our schedule will depend on the baby as I feed by demand.  I told her that we might be up all night, and that when the baby is hungry – she’ll have to knock on my door so I can nurse.  She was really nice and attentive.  She took care of my baby very well – what impressed me the most was that how she cleaned my baby’s bumbum with rashes!  I did not need to teach her what to do – she knew what needed to be done (which was to use running water)  the impressive thing was that – she did not bother fetching water and putting it in a wash basin, what she did was carry my baby and turn on the faucet and voila!  Baby’s bumbum was clean – baby did not feel the ‘hurt’ from the wet cotton’s contact on the rashes, this made me realize – why I never thought of bringing my baby to the sink for clean ups!  I then tell myself – first time mom, walang alam!  Haha!  Also she asked me if she could do the laundry in the bathroom since she couldn’t be away from the baby – another ‘why didn’t I think of that’ moment!  Smart and practical right? 

So now, it’s been almost three weeks since she’s been here with me and I have to say – she made things a LOT easier for me. I’ve also semi stopped using the baby monitor during the day.  I’ve been able to go out without worrying if my baby is in good hands, I knew that if I gave instructions, Yaya D would immediately understand and know how to execute them.  She’s proven her worth in as early as the first three days to me.  Yaya D and I are good, we’re good.  I really like her and I see how she lovingly takes care of my baby.  She told me there are two kinds of yayas – kind one is the yaya who just works for the salary; kind two is the yaya who has compassion and love for her work and kids, she said that these two traits cannot be taught but is innate.  And she is the second kind – you can see how she likes taking care of babies/kids – her patience is long and she never loses her cool even if the baby cries endlessly.  She’s also very enthusiastic and good with ‘pakikisama’ – she’s the exact opposite of YFH.  She gets along well with everyone and is very polite and courteous.  Since her former employers were Chinese, she knew what to call my parents and my in-laws.

I think that’s why I haven’t been ranting of yaya woes, I’m happy with her.  I consider myself lucky that I found her – and I think she also feels the same way, well – I hope she feels the same way too!  I can actually say that I love her J  Hahaha!! 

Surviving my FIRST YFH experience

What is YFH - loosely coined by mommies, its Yaya From Hell - YFH

A few days ago, I finally had the courage to let my yaya go already.  I was becoming very dissatisfied with her work already - the last straw came when my Kailee developed rashes in her butt area - whats worse was that, there were two spots that the skin peeled off!  That was when I decided that I've had enough.  You can read my Yaya stories here, here and here.

The last straw happened at 4 in the morning just this Tuesday - you see the night before, my Panget was checking in on Kailee before he went to sleep - I was doing the same, watching the baby monitor.  Suddenly Kailee cried, I heard my Panget call YFH to check on Kailee's nappies - so I was waiting to see a different set of hands remove Kailee's blanket - but a few seconds passed and I saw nothing.  I just heard noises that I assumed were from opening the bathroom door and YFH preparing the things needed to clean Kailee's but.  I immediately went into the room and saw that YFH was inside the bathroom, I asked YFH 'Na-check mo na ba yung diaper ni Kailee?' to which she answered 'OPO Ma'am'.  My Panget and I looked at each other dumbfounded!  My Panget said that YFH did NOT check the diapers and I also knew she didn't - so I asked the question again - to which she replied 'Opo ma'am kaning 10 pa po' and that was like 12 midnight already!  I was pissed!  Because the fact was she didn't check the diaper when she said she did!  It was as if she thought we didn't know or we didn't see her!  So during the 4am feeding, I told her that I wanted her to check the diapers FIRST before doing anything - and she said that she did!  I knew she didn't but I didn't bother telling her what I knew and saw - I insisted to her once again 'Basta, gusto ko silipin mo muna yung diaper bago ka magprepare ng mga panlinis'  to which she replied 'Eh ma'am, na-check ko naman po eh!'  When I asked her what time she said 10pm - the conversation went on and on, her - declaring that she checked the nappies.  I was so pissed that I told her that I saw her through the baby monitor that she did not check - it was then that she admitted that she did not check but she said this 'Nakita ko na pong lumobo ang diaper ni Kailee'  How the F will she see the lobo of diaper when there's a blanket over Kailee?!  This made me more angry because she was already trying to make palusot!  I was so mad at her that I told her 'Pano mangyayari yon kung ma kumot na nakatakit sa katawan ni Kailee?'  She didn't stop from there!  She insisted that she saw what she saw!  This made me so angry to the point that I told her 'Tanungin natin si Sir bukas kung may kumot o wala si Kailee'  When I said this she immediately looked at the clock and said 'Sige na ma'am, para matapos na'  My blood was boiling already!!  After nursing Kailee - I was soooo pissed at her that I got Kailee and had her sleep in my room!  I then told my Panget that morning that I've had enough of YFH.  He then gave me the go signal to have her changed - he heard the WHOLE conversation that yaya was making palusot - and FINALLY saw the light that I wasn't patient enough with YFH.

So that Tuesday - I went and woke Yaya up so she can do her personal chores.  And she took her sweet time - my patience was already thinning but I still kept quiet.  But that afternoon - I told her off that I was letting her go because I was becoming dissatisfied with her work, and that the rashes of Kailee were the last straw.  She took it well, I think she was happy too!  You see, she didn't want to work anymore and wanted to go home already.  I told her that what I didn't like most about her was that she was making so many palusot thinking that she can get away with them!  She will only admit after much proding which is not nice - I mean, pahahabain mo pa ba yung usapan or aamin ka nalang diba?

That didn't end there!  Apparently this YFH was going through our garbage!  She took with her ALL of the ice cream containers - deeming it hers, when I said 'Hindi ba amin yan?  Tinapon na namin yan sa basurahan?'  she said 'Kaya nga ma'am since nasa basura na, kinuha ko po!'  I was pissed!  Then I saw a bunch of diapers that I threw away because I wasn't sure if it was hygenic since it came from a diaper cake gift', she took them ALL!  I told her that those were intended for trash - if she wanted to take them she HAD to ask permission - because in all honesty, what she did can me deemed stealing or taking without permission!  But what can I do right?

So, when she left - I was soooooooo relieved!!!!  The feeling was sooo liberating!  It was like nabunutan ako ng tinik!!

I have a lot of friends chiding me with 'Welcome to the club of Yaya's from HELL!'

Yaya is testing my Patience

Lord, please bless me with MORE patience!!

Patience is indeed a virtue and as of the moment, it is being tested in me right now.

I've written about Yaya Jenny previously but I think I forgot to mention that she had a change of heart, she had decided to stay.  I don't know if I was happy or was saddened by that news because here are my pros and cons:

Pros:
-  Yaya can 'hele' Kailee to sleep
-  Yaya wakes up at night when Kailee fusses (and doesn't complain about it!)
-  Yaya cleans the room, launders and irons ALL of Kailee's clothes and other items
-  Yaya is patient with Kailee when she cries and fusses
-  Yaya can handle Kailee's loud cries and kicks
-  Yaya is neat with Kailee's things
-  Yaya smiles a lot and sports a happy face
-  Yaya likes to dress Kailee up and talks to her too

Cons:
-  Yaya can't seem to follow verbal instructions given to her (she will tell you that she understands the instructions but when you have her repeat them, she smiles and makes an effort to try and let you feel that she understands what you needed her to do to the point that she will make things up)
-  Yaya has zombie moments
-  Yaya is slow in doing her personal chores (eating, taking a bath, etc..) and tasks given to her
-  Yaya is nosy at times (she likes to be in the know)
-  Yaya likes to join in on conversations of others (like guests who come and visit Kailee)
-  Yaya likes to brag about her past employers and what she does
-  Yaya likes to make palusot - thinking that she can 'lusot' but is always na bibisto!
-  Yaya's favorite line is 'Alam ko na yan, ginagawa/ginagamit ko yan sa mga dati kong alaga' or 'Ganyan ang ginagawa ko sa anak ko'
-  Yaya likes to share stories of her personal life to people who are not interested
-  Yaya doesn't like it that you confront her nor does she like being told what wrong thing she did
-  Yaya will just say OPO MA'AM just for the sake of saying it without really understanding the instructions

As of the moment, the Lord is I think testing my patience, why?  Here's why:

Ever since Kailee was born - the midwife we hired, Elena taught us to use petroleum jelly as a preventive measure to diaper rash.  She taught us to coat the folds and the butt area of Kailee before putting on diapers.  This procedure comes after the drying process (after wiping off of poop/pee) and Elena taught us to use cotton buds to spread it evenly and lightly.  I remember distinctly Elena telling Yaya Jenny to take care of Kailee's but because Elena was the one who took care of Kailee's butt for the first two weeks of Kailee's life. 

Fast forward to two weeks later, Yaya comes up to me and tells me 'Parang may rashes si Kailee'  I then took a look and saw redness, I just told Yaya to place petroleum jelly more generously to that area.  And she did - but after one day, the redness seemed to turn into small rashes - this prompted me to text my pedia Dr. Joy Ty-Sy to ask what can be placed on Kailee's redness - she told me to get Desitin.  Good thing my good friend Kath, bought a big jar of it while in Canada, and she gladly shared some with me.  This was a week ago, we continued to put Desitin and it seems to be working fine, the redness has somehow diminished and there were only two parts that needed more attention.

Fast forward to this morning:  After nursing Kailee this morning, she started to cry - I knew this cry of hers wasn't of hunger but of pain.  I immediately assumed that Kailee was getting irritated because of wet nappies - this made me check Kailee's diapers and true enough, her diaper was full of poop!  I then gave Yaya a call (she was downstairs laundering clothes of Kailee and then some) she said that she will be up in a few minutes - this prompted me to do everything myself.  I prepared all the things that I needed to change her - and when I did, what welcomed my eyes were redness everywhere!  The once redness in the butt area was already fleshy - apparently, a little skin peeled off!  I then realized that that was the reason for the constant crying!  I immediately told my Panget that we needed to go to the doctor to have her butt checked - and when we did, our Pedia winced and said that indeed, the rashes were causing Kailee pain.  She advised us to change diapers during the night because the cause of the rashes was prolonged exposure to wetness - meaning, the diapers weren't absorbent enough thus the contact of pee and poo was too long.  She also advised us not to use wet cotton balls nor wet wipes to clean the poop and pee, she told us to use running water or 'i-tabo' the water for cleaning - and to use Cetaphil.  When we left the clinic, I asked Yaya to repeat the instructions of the doctor - she looked at me and it took a while for her to verbalize the answer - her first answer was 'Gumamit ng basang cotton balls...'  When she said this, I immediately cut her off saying that that wasn't the instructions.  She then thought about it again and said 'Ah!  Gumamit ng Cetaphil!'  I replied with 'Ano pa' because that was only part of the instructions!  She was blank - I think Yaya has selective hearing - the only things she heard was 'Cetaphil' - I then reminded her 'Diba ang sabi gumamit ng running water at Cetaphil?  Ibig sabihin kelangan ipadaan ng tubig yung lilinisang area'  When my Panget heard this - he told me to repeat the instructions to the Yaya when we went home.  And when we got home - Kailee pooped, and so there - we had our first trial at the new instructions of the Pedia.  Yaya prepared the water in a wash basin and then she took the cotton balls and the baby wash!  When I saw this - I was very much bothered already, I asked her 'Ano ulit ang instructions ni doctora sa atin?  Paano lilinisin ang pwet ni Kailee?'  She then remembered there was no need for the cotton balls - I then gestured to the baby wash - she looked at me blankly and said 'Gagamitin ko po ito, panlinis''  I asked her again 'Ano ba ang sinabi ni doctora na gagamitin natin?  She thought of an answer then all of a sudden, her face brightened up and she exclaimed 'Cetaphil ang gamitin!'  I then pointed to her the baby wash - to which she told me 'Eh wala namang Cetaphil eh!'  I told her - that I have one.  I'm sure Yaya knew that I had one - I used Cetaphil to clean Kailee's face, its quite impossible for her to not see the big Cetaphil pump!  I assumed that she was making excuses again - because the Cetaphil method of cleaning slipped her mind.  And then I asked - 'Marunong ka ba gumamit ng Cetaphil?'  She replied yes - this made me ask her 'Sige, pano mo gagamitin ang Cetaphil?'  You know what her reply is to me?  She said 'Ginagamit ko na po yan sa mga dati kong alaga'  This line is soooooo gasgas already!  This has been her reply WHENEVER we have a new items that we'd like Kailee to use like the Desitin cream, and etc.  I then asked her again 'Paano mo gagamitin ang Cetaphil - Ikwento mo sa akin'  to which she said 'Ilalagay ko ang Cetaphil sa basang twalya at ipupunas kay Kailee'  WRONG!!  The reason why the Pedia advised us to use running water was to eliminate the friction caused by the cotton balls or towels rubbing on Kailee's rashes - contact by cotton and towels will only cause pain to Kailee!  I then repeated the instructions of the Pedia to her - and she said 'Oo nga, tama yan - para hindi masaktan si Kailee sa mga sugat niya'  WTF??!! Now you agree with me, when just a few seconds ago - iba ang gagawin mo!!  I was really irritated and bothered kaya after Yaya cleaned Kailee up with me na nagbubuhos ng water via tabo - I stayed with Kailee and I didn't want to leave her.


My patience is really really thinning - HELP ME LORD!!


Konti nalang talaga, I'm on the verge of letting her go na!! 
Ewan ko ba kung mashado lang ako maselan, kung ako ba ang maarte or what eh, pero every little thing - I see!!! Grr.....

Time flies

Can you believe that in a few days - my little K will be a month old already?

It seems like yesterday that I gave birth to her!  I can still recall every single detail of my giving birth to her!  Wow - time does fly huh??!!

Now that she's almost a month old - I can see her moods now.  Lately, she's been wanting to sleep on my chest every after feeding - and it's not as easy as that!  When I notice that she's asleep, I'd lay her on the crib - but after a few seconds, she'll be awake and crying!  When I pick her up and lay her on my chest, she'll go back to sleep!  This has been happening for a week now.  It's really nice BUT sometimes, I can't get things done - like going to the bathroom (sorry, too much information) or when I get hungry!  But it's okay - whatever my little K wants or needs and as long as I can do it for her - let it be.  It seems like I'm her mattress now!  Hahahaha

It was just this evening that we noticed that she can already see us.  My Panget was wearing his red basketball jersey - and little K's eyes were following my Panget when he moved!  It was so cute because my Panget would literally move from one side to another just to prove that little K can indeed see!!  And she can see!!  YIPEEEEEEEE!!!!

For the past two days, I've noticed that little K seemed to be hungry more often.  When before, we had a sort of schedule of two to three hour intervals for feeding - now, it can be as short as an hour and the longest would be an hour and a half!  I am afraid that she might be eating too much because of the repeated spit-ups, but doctor says its normal - the feeding and the spit-ups.

I asked my baker sister in law to make a cake for my little K this Friday - so we can celebrate little K's one month birthday!!!

I can't believe that I'm already nearing the end of counting how many days old little K is - I should start counting how many months old she is.....

Happy First Month my little darling Kailee!!
We love you!!