Yaya Hunting..

I have been hunting... since November..

And so far - I've found none..

It's actually a risk - because we won't know for sure how she will be when my baby comes.  But as of the moment, I am getting stressed that I can't find one.

I have been calling agencies - I have been interviewing left and right, but so far - those that I have interviewed are, well - not so good!  There was one that sounded really good on paper, and when I asked for her previous employers - she gave me names, well known names actually.  I was taken aback honestly because I had connections to these names that she gave me!  One was the boss of a friend and the other was the sister in law of a friend.  I told the yaya to make sure that she gives me the correct information because I can confirm with her previous employers - and she was confident!  She had the following informations:

Age:  40

Employer #1 - Boss of the friend
Stayed with her for 2 years
Left because when she came back from her vacation, there was already a replacement.

Employer #2 - Sister in law of a friend
Stayed with her for 5 years
Left because the child was too much for her to handle already

Employer #3 - Wife of the Nueva Ecija governor
Stayed with her for 2 years
Left because when she came back from her vacation, there was already a replacement.

That same night, I called my friend who's boss was Yaya's former employer.  At 10am the next morning, I got a call from my friend.  According to her boss - Yaya is not very nice, she works okay but has a habit of bad mouthing her former employers and Yaya lied when she said that she stayed 2 years with her - apparently, Yaya left after one year.  Yaya asked for a vacation and NEVER came back - the boss learned that Yaya went to work for Employer #2 already.  When my friend asked for Yaya's age - I said 40 - she laughed!  Because apparently, two years ago - Yaya was already 40!

After a few weeks, my friend whose sister in law was Employer #2 sent me a text message saying that Yaya is not so okay, and that Yaya is very materialistic.

Fail diba??

As for the others, well - they seemed okay BUT I haven't met them personally so, I can't say if they're okay or not.  Agencies have this habit of forcing me to decide ASAP.  Which I am not keen on doing so..  I believe that if its meant to be - its meant to be.

Fears VS Excitement

As my due date gets near - I am getting more afraid. 

Why?  Because honestly, I fear pain, I fear the sight of blood, the sight of needles, the hulabaloo of it all, and most especially the fear of the unknown.

I am getting emotional these days - thoughts and wonders of worries are always there.  I am clueless on the things that will be happening to me.  Friends say to enjoy the ride, but how am I supposed to enjoy the ride when I am clueless?  You see, I am the type of person who wants to somehow know whats going to happen, at least to have an idea on what will transpire - so I can prepare myself, somehow.  Weird as it is, but that's me.  Hahahaha!!

My body is getting heavier - I can feel it in my knees.  My walk is different, my sleep is different, everything is different!  Hahaha...

My excitement is overshadowed by fear - I am still not prepared!

Some friends say that I have nine (9) months to prepare, but I just have two (2) months left and STILL I am half-baked.

Sigh....

Almost 31 weeks..

I am nearing my due date..

Honestly, I am more scared than excited.  Why?  Because I fear pain, blood and the unknown.  I am weird like that.  Some get excited, I get scared!  Hahaha... 

Reading my kinakapatid's blog about her babies, made me a little excited.  There are ups and downs of course, but seems like every experience is priceless!

Right now, my feet are propped up - my feet are fat.. and my feet are not normally fat!  They're actually narrow and thin.  Sigh.. A lot of people say - konting tiis nalang daw, I wish!!

My underarms are super dark na.. It's quite embarrassing to stretch my arms upwards - but I don't care anymore!  Hahaha... Yes, I am that 'makapal'.  Hahahaha!! :)

Dear baby - please don't make it hard for me ha... or else you'll be the only one!!  Ayokong ma-trauma!! Hahahaha....

BTW - I've gained around 25lbs already, and I have 2 more months to go!!  My OB has told me to slow down on my holiday eating.  Hahaha!!  I wonder how much weight I've gained this week.  Wish me luck!! Hahaha...

Happy New Year!!! :)